After successfully adopting a child it is common for a number of post adoption issues to arise that do not in other family situations. In the adoptive family, it is important to immediately challenge these issues and have them resolved successfully to aid in the well being of both the adoptive family and the adopted child.
The most difficult issue to deal with will be if the infant adopted begins experiencing feeling of loss or grief. This often happens at least once in the life of an adopted child and they may come to grieve once they are fully aware of the fact that they are adopted. Throughout the different stages of a child’s life they may struggle with the feelings associated with why they were place for adoption and may become confused about these varying emotions.
They may feel intense anger towards their birth family for placing them for adoption and then at the next instance they may feel compassion and begin to worry about the well being of the birth family. Since the child has nowhere else to turn when these confusing feelings arise they may act out with hostility towards the adoptive parents.
As the child grows, both intellectually and physically, they will think and react differently to each of the emotions they have towards being an adoptee. During a child’s life there are certain milestones that may trigger adoption issues that adoptive parents should be aware of. It is advised that during these moments that a watch should be kept for excessive mood swings and changes in eating or sleeping habits.
Some of these moments include: birthdays of not only the adoptee but birthdays of anybody closely related to the adopted child, anniversaries of important adoption dates, holidays (in particular Mother’s Day and Father’s Day), entering school for the first time or entering a new school where the child may have to explain adoption to peers. These are just a few times when issues may occur; in general, any life changing moment can be a trigger.
There are a number of ways to receive support during the difficult times of an adopted child’s rearing. The most important and successful is finding and partaking in a adoptive parent support groups. In these groups adoptive parents and prospective adoptive parents come together to help each other tackle some of the difficult issues that arise in all aspects of adoption.
Adoptive parents can expect to find the reach of adoption support groups to be far reaching. Often there is a telephone warm line system, buddy family system, children’s support groups, group only activities and workshops and conferences. Support groups themselves quite frequently become an extension of the adoptive family itself.
In addition to offline support groups, assistance can also be found via online support groups. There are a number of quality groups with member’s areas and discussion forums with extremely knowledgeable and helpful people. Online support groups are available twenty-four hours a day and the memberships can number in the thousands.
It is extremely important for adoptive parents to realize they are not alone with the challenges they face raising their child. Numbers of people have experienced the exact same issues and can offer knowledgeable support to help climb any mountains that crop up.